I think two of the most dangerous influences any church faces are: (1) Spiritual leaders who have lost their first love and (2) the onslaught of church hoppers.
Having wavered before in my faith and flirted with losing my first love with God, I know firsthand how dangerous the first one can be. But that’s something we spiritual leaders have control over. The second one…not so much.
I call church hoppers “connoisseurs of fine churches” because they’re continually on a quest to find the church that is spiritual enough for them, will endlessly engorge themselves on the “services” of the churches they attend, and always have a critical word to say afterwards whenever “church” doesn’t meet their standards.
Here are seven things we try to do to change their mindset (or keep their butts from staying in the seats of our church for very long):
1. Ask church hoppers to commit to tithing and serving
That usually takes care of it right there. Because church hoppers are consumers by nature, anything that strikes them as sacrificial will surely turn them off. As a ministry friend of mine used to tell me, “At the first sign of trouble, raise the bar.”
2. Tell your people to stop inviting their Christian friends to church
Right before Christmas I may have been one of the only pastors out there that stood up and said, “Please DO NOT invite your Christian friends to our Christmas services. We want other churches in the area to know we have their back. Also, we want to grow this church through conversion growth, not transfer growth. Let’s pack this place out with people who are keeping God up at night because they are living far from him.” I strategically do that 3-4 times a year.
3. Preach short sermons
Howard Hendricks used to say, “Keep them longing, not loathing.” I buy into that philosophy. I try to speak anywhere between 24 and 28 minutes max (my staff will read this and say PLEASE 
…okay, I TRY to preach 24-28 minutes!). Shorter sermons drive church hoppers nuts because they want to “be fed” (i.e. long expository sermons). I’m not interested in “feeding people” unless they are in the early stages of their spiritual journey. Church hoppers as well as Christians further along their spiritual journey need to be feeding themselves. Anything I provide on Sunday morning is in addition to their own self-directed spiritual nourishment. One point, one scripture, 24-28 minutes, that’s it.
4. Don’t sing 9,345 worship songs
Church hoppers, 9 times out of 10, came from a church background where they were taught to need 5-6 worship songs to really connect with God. That needs to be re-taught. Where did we get the idea that worship = singing anyway? That’s part of it, but only a small part of it. Every part of the service is worship. Every part of my life is worship. Limiting your worship songs except for occasions when you are led by God to expand the repertoire forces people to recognize this or leave.
5. Keep your services short
We keep our services to 55 minutes, period. That’s it. That’s because we believe “church” is more than the official service that happens on a Sunday morning. It’s what happens before, during and afterwards. It’s what happens during the week when 2-3 gather. Experiencing a well-conceived 55 minute service to the church hopper is like spending your whole life overeating and then sitting down for a healthy, well-proportioned meal that someone else serves you (“Hey, I’m used to eating 16 pieces of fried chicken! Why do I only get two?”).
6. Eliminate Christian “insider” language
The fact that I say “Leader” and “forgiver” from the stage drives church hoppers nuts. “You meant to say ‘Savior and Lord,’ didn’t you?” At issue is an old mission’s word called “contextualization,” which basically means we need to speak in the language and culture of the hearer, not the speaker. The Greek word “kurios” doesn’t mean “Lord” in 21st century American idiom. Your old Bible translation from 50 years ago may read that way, but people aren’t talking that way today. Challenge your “insider” language and watch how church hoppers and their friends file right out of your services.
7. Sing Non-Christian songs in your services
Trust me, that will weed them out. A few years ago we opened a church service with Jet’s “Are you Gonna Be My Girl?” The theme of the song perfectly set up what I was going to teach on later in the service.
On Monday I promptly received an email about it…
This past weekend, I could not believe my ears. When worship opened up, I heard the opening chords for Jet’s- “Are you going to be my girl?” I was expecting the Apologetix parody version, “Are you gonna be Ike’s girl?”
But in listening to the lyrics it sounded like they were covering the actual Jet Song – a song about figuring out how to get a one night stand, for a girl who came to some club or party with another guy.
I am hoping that I was mistaken and they were playing the Christian Parody version because I am having a real issue with wrapping my head around why it would be remotely ‘OK’ to play this content in a worship service.
There is a line between having a light fun service to reach the new/non-believer and cheapening the value and truth that the gospel can stand alone to reach out to someone. This may have crossed it.
Frustrated…
Name Withheld
Here was my response…
Frustrated,
I got your email and appreciate you taking the time to shoot me your thoughts.
I must say that while I appreciate your concern, this is certainly not the first nor will it be the last time we sing non-Christian music in our worship services.
We do this because we are trying to reach both non-Christians as well as Christians in the same service, and playing a non-Christian song up front in the service, we have learned, puts people far from God at ease and can powerfully illustrate a teaching point.
Our philosophy has always been that Christians should be the ones that should be made the most uncomfortable in church, not the non-Christians. The way I put it is this — we will always choose to offend the Christians before the non-Christians.
Seeing that you are frustrated, and given the fact that I talked with a bunch of people far from God on Sunday who loved the energy of the song and felt connected to the service because of it, it appears that we have achieved our goal.
My suggestion is this — weigh carefully whether or not you want to be a part of a church that sings music like this, and plays difficult to watch video clips, and a host of other things to reach people far from God. If not, then now would be the time to look for another church before you put down roots too deep.
If on the other hand this is the kind of church you want to be a part of, I would welcome you to join in with everything you have and start reaching out to people far from God.
I hope this helps.
Thanks!
Brian
Church hoppers can be a lethal bunch, so don’t make them too cozy. However, and I’ll blog about this at another time – please remember that God can also be leading some of those people to your church too. But that’s a post for another day.
What do you think of our approach?
Recent Posts You Might Find Interesting:
I’m Not Being Fed (and other stupid things Christians say)
Why Some People Are Self-Controlled And Others Aren’t
Rejecting The “You’re Not Committed Enough” Guilt Trip
You Can’t Medicate Your Way Out Of Not Giving A Crap
A lot of non-Christians like pornography too, why not play that in church? Do you see how the argument you are using can be taken? If you have to use gimmicks to get people into church, you have to use gimmicks to keep them there.
The gospel WILL offend non-Christians because man’s heart is inherently wicked and hates God.
Jeremiah 6:10
To whom can I speak and give warning? Who will listen to me? Their ears are closed so they cannot hear. The word of the LORD is offensive to them; they find no pleasure in it.
“I’m not interested in “feeding people” unless they are in the early stages of their spiritual journey. Church hoppers as well as Christians further along their spiritual journey need to be feeding themselves.”
Then you are openly admitting you have no interest in pastoring.
Pastoring/Shepherding can involve mission work but that is not the only purpose of it.
John 21:17
The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my sheep.
I say these things in love because I am concerned for you and the people in your church. Perhaps you could clarify if I am misinterpreting your meaning.
Thank you.
Skyler,
Thanks for your comment. I’m very interested in helping people become radically sold-out followers of Jesus. If by “pastoring” you mean pandering to the self-serving church hopping crowd, then, yes, I have no interest in being that kind of pastor. Compare the two instances of Jesus addressing Peter –
Matthew 16 and what you quoted John 21 and you have a balanced view of Jesus’ call to discipleship and the role pastors play in the process.
Thank you for your reply.
I’m not speaking of “pandering”, but don’t even the “self-serving church hopping crowd” need to be preached to? If they are simply causing division then their sin needs to be pointed out to them and the need to repent. However, the idea of just writing them off and saying in essence, don’t let the door hit you on your way out, seems wrong. If these people are believers I would hope that their concerns could be addressed with a little more understanding and humility on the church leaders part. Quibbling about worship style is one thing but I think it’s a fair question to ask “How far is too far?” when a church begins incorporating secular means. Again, where is the line drawn or is ANYTHING acceptable if it brings in unbelievers? I think the slippery slope concern is a valid one that needs to be addressed.
Skyler,
I would respond by saying two things.
First, of course, as you point out, those not church hopping need to experience regular, on-going exposure to teaching, worship, etc. That’s vital. Check out my lasts two week’s sermons. You can tell I don’t shy away from anything.
Second, I definitely think you can go too far. We’ve tried things in the past that have crossed the line. The way we say it is “We’ll do anything short of sin to reach people.” To me that’s the line.
Excellent post, Brian!
You know my church is pretty non-traditional too. And I think from time to time, my pastor gets emails likes the ones you’ve gotten as well. There are some people who just AREN’T going to be happy no matter what.
Our church has a Starbucks (yes, a real true Starbucks) inside the church. Is this a ‘gimmick’? I’m sure many people would say “of course!” and roll their eyes. But the FACT is that ‘Bux is a staple of modern society, unchurched people see a Starbucks and feel (frequently) immediately comfortable, like “Oh, this place isn’t so stuffy AFTER all!”.
Bottom line (and we’ve all heard it said before), the church isn’t, never was intended TO be, and please God, don’t ever let it BECOME a ‘museum for saints’…. it’s a hospital for us flawed and cracked sinners to come together, encourage one another, and learn how to “do life” God’s way.
Anyway, I still think you rock. And if I’m ever up in Philly, you can bet I’ll drop by for a visit.
Thanks Tracey. Great hearing from you, It’s been a while. Hope you are doing well.
For some reason I missed this one Brian. Great post. Practical stuff. Living in a small town we probably don’t get this as much as you do, however it all makes sense.
Bill, where are you a pastor?
Spencer, IN. It is west of Bloomington. I told Jon (Stretched) that I graduated from KCC (now KCU). Course that was back in the dark ages (1974). I am originally from West Mifflin, a suburb of Pittsburgh. Allegheny County. My brother is Rob Grandi, not sure if you might know him. He has moved back to Pgh with his new wife.
I am in seminary and I visited your church. I loved it. Ready this blog made me think about many aspects of ministry and I know that I will have to do things that others find totally weird and awkward whenever serving our Leader. The One we love always inspires the ones who are following the Way to be as creative as possible.
As I said, I have been to your church and God is definitely inspiring to do most of the things you do!! I would encourage anyone reading this to visit your church and then place a comment to truly understand what you mean in this post.
Sin is the line!! Thanks for your Wisdom!!!
@Tracey Axnick WHOA!!! A Starbucks in order to attempt to reach the unchurched!!!! I pray I only work with people as bold and ready to serve as you!!
Hey Brian,
I love this! It does get real old to have those hoppers continue to demand to have it their way when they are really not interested in those living far from God.
Thanks
Wow, it’s interesting how the tone of the articles changes completely when the responses start. Responses like “Sin is the line.” at which we will go no further are borne of an article about how to get people out of “your” church. I’m left with two questions: “Is it really ‘your’ church or is it a church that belongs to God’s sinful ‘church hoppers?” Second, why? Why would you write this? Of all the things about which you could blog, why choose to castigate those who are searching for a home. I suggest that in a spare moment you reread the article just for the tone and ask what drove you to write this. To Skyler, Amen. You got it right!