Tuesday, May 1, 2012

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Why I Never Read Anonymous Letters, Comments, Emails, or Notes In The Offering

I have a simple rule: whenever I receive anonymous letters, notes, emails, or blog comments they go straight into the trash.

I never read a single word. Ever.

Why?

  1. People who write anonymous letters want to avoid the hard work of discipleship. Matthew 18 makes it quite clear that Jesus’ followers are to take conflict resolution seriously, and very specific steps are given on how to resolve it – all face to face.
  2. I make mistakes, lots of them to be exact. And I can’t grow and learn from them if those who want to point out my mistakes aren’t credible sources.

I get 4-5 such items a month (usually letters, emails or notes in the offering bowl), some of them quite cruel in nature. In talking to my friends who are pastors (and bloggers) it appears I’m not alone.

What that means is there are at least 4-5 people out there every month who…

  1. Rob me of the opportunity to learn and grow.
  2. Rob themselves of the opportunity to get all the facts.
  3. Have wasted a lot of time writing something that no-one will ever read.

Actually, #3 isn’t entirely true.

Because of an episode a few years ago with some really bizarre anonymous letters, we took the advice of law enforcement and no longer throw these letters/notes away.

They are handed over to my Executive Pastor and are sealed and placed in a file.

Every. Single. One.

I would encourage you as a leader to do the same.

When needed we’ll take those letters and turn them over to FBI/law enforcement friends of ours who will draw DNA/fingerprints from them and formally log them as documents of interest in potential harassment cases.

99% of the time they amount to nothing.

But that 1% turns out to be the linchpin in nailing someone.

Trust me. :)

How do you handle anonymous letters/emails/blog comments?

Please leave a comment and make sure to connect with me on Facebook and Twitter!
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in Biblical Issues, Rethinking Church

Monday, April 23, 2012

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The Painful Cost Of Unity

Unity within a church is the indispensable key to accomplishing the Great Commission.

Show me a church with tremendous talent, resources and potential, but no unity, and I’ll show you a church that is already dead in its tracks.

But show me a unified church with limited resources and significant challenges, and I’ll show you a church that will find a way to win every time.

Church unity is never accomplished by wanting to feel unified. The feeling of unity is never the goal. It’s the by-product of church leaders focusing on 5 extremely difficult and often times painful actions:

  1. Unity comes through installing good leaders and removing bad ones.
  2. Unity comes through casting a clear enough vision that the wrong people don’t join your church.
  3. Unity comes through confronting sin.
  4. Unity comes through teaching sound doctrine, even when you think people will leave as a result.
  5. Unity comes through leaders insisting that the entire church follows the biblical path of conflict resolution found in Matthew 18:15-17, without exception.

Unity is a funny thing.

If as leaders we focus on trying to obtain the feeling of being unified, we’ll ultimately accomplish anything but.

But if we focus on simply doing what godly leaders do, unity somehow always has a way of showing up on our doorstep.

Have you seen examples of churches avoiding the five actions I listed? What happened? 

Please leave a comment and make sure to connect with me on Facebook and Twitter!

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in Biblical Issues, Rethinking Church

Monday, April 16, 2012

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6 Uncommon Characteristics Of Masculine Male Pastors

In a previous post I highlighted what I think are the 7 uncommon characteristics of masculine Christian men.

Limitations of the word “effeminate” aside, here’s what I consider six uncommon characteristics of masculine male pastors.

1. Masculine male pastors create church cultures that protect women and children.

I’m convinced that one of the reasons the Catholic Church swept the issue of clergy sexual abuse under the rug for so long is because of the preponderance of effeminate priests and cardinals. Can you imagine Jeremiah, Elijah, or John the Baptist putting up with that garbage? I find it interesting that when widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution of food in Acts 6 the Apostles instructed them to “choose seven men from among you” to make sure this problem stopped. Not women, but strong men.

A couple years ago I was sitting on a ferry when a drunk came in and started bugging the female passengers on the boat. After seeing him intimidate a 14 year old girl and an elderly woman I came uncorked on the guy. Know what happened? No other man backed me up. They sat and stared straight ahead! Call it whatever you want – the combination of testosterone, physical stature, Ephesians 5 “headship” tendencies, whatever – masculine godly pastors instinctively protect women and children. As a result women feel valued and sense that the churches those pastors serve are safe places spiritually, emotionally and physically. I think this explains why so many elderly women are drawn to churches with masculine male pastors.

2. Masculine male pastors publicly address uniquely male sins head-on.

In Titus 2:6 the Apostle Paul exhorted Titus to “encourage the young men to be self-controlled.” Crete, the island on which Titus was serving, was sexually charged. Most homes had a statue outside marking its property called a “herms” – a small statue with a large erect penis (denoting strength and virility). Temple prostitutes were plentiful. Affairs were expected. So what did Paul do? He told Titus to address it head on. Know how many times I heard a sermon on sex, masturbation, pornography, adultery, lust or sexual fantasizing the entire 18 years I went to church as a kid? Zero. Not one time. Unlike Paul, effeminate pastors think issues such as these are “inappropriate for church” and assume these issues will take care of themselves. Continue Reading…

in Living It Out, Rethinking Church

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

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10 Reasons Why My Leadership Team Is Amazing

Last night I walked out of the room shaking my head.

God, I don’t know how you pulled this off, but this team is simply amazing.

Unified. Visionary. Encouraging. Fun. Passionate. Gifted. Transparent. Gracious. These are just a few of the words I’d use to describe the people who faithfully serve on CCV’s Leadership Team.

Your church may use a different name – Leadership Council, Governing Board, etc. – we simply use the phrase “Leadership Team” to describe the group of people called to serve the function of what the Bible calls “Elders.”

Whatever their name, my prayer is your group is as gifted and passionate as the volunteer servant leaders I have the privilege of serving alongside. Every church ought to know the joy of being led well.

Since these kinds of things rarely happen by accident, I’d like to share with you 10 reasons why I think this team is such a special group.

  1. I’m not the smartest person in the room.
  2. I’m not the best leader in the room.
  3. I’m not the most committed Christian in the room.
  4. I’m not the oldest person in the room.
  5. Everyone knows how to humbly submit to each other.
  6. Nobody is afraid to speak the truth, in love.
  7. When they ask me to jump, I might stop to ask, “How high?” I usually don’t.
  8. We have each other’s backs.
  9. We hold our tongues in meetings and only speak to something when we are 100% sure we have something of value to add. I speak fewer words in those meetings than anyone in the room.
  10. We tremble at the realization that God is actually leading His local church here in Philly through us, and therefore are sober-minded in our task.

Have you ever been a part of a great team? Horrible one? What made it that way?

in Living It Out, Rethinking Church

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

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14 Questions About Leadership – Dick Alexander (Part 2 of 2)

Dick Alexander, Senior Minister of LifeSpring Christian Church, was the guest speaker at the Northeast Pastors Summit held at Christ’s Church of the Valley on June 2, 2010. Part 2 of 2. Click HERE for Part 1.

in Rethinking Church

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

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14 Questions About Leadership – Dick Alexander (Part 1 of 2)

Dick Alexander, Senior Minister of LifeSpring Christian Church, was the guest speaker at the Northeast Pastors Summit held at Christ’s Church of the Valley on June 2, 2010. Part 1 of 2.

in Rethinking Church

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